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공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 07. 25 조회 13699

my homework~

작성자: 1102044240 담당 튜터: Paula
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I like going camping.
The camping place is the perfect place for my children.
My son and I usually play baseball while my daughter likes to ride a bike. My wife reads book at the bench.
One of my favorite camping place in Seoul is the Han River park.
It is surrounded by beautiful nature and there are various activities that families can do together
I have purchased tents and copel and other equipments necessary for the camping last year.
I could only go camping once due to my work.
I feel guilty for my children, so I have decided to go camping at least twice this year.


I like to go to the park on weekends.
I go there almost every Saturday with my family and always prepare
some food such as homemade sandwiches, salads and kookies
Because, it take only five minutes to get there from my house.
튜터 교정 답변

I like going camping. The camping place is the perfect place for my children. My son and I usually play baseball while my daughter likes to ride a bike. My wife reads book at the bench. One of my favorite camping place in Seoul is the Han River park. It is surrounded by beautiful nature and there are various activities that families can do together I have purchased tents and copel and other equipments necessary for the camping last year. I could only go camping once due to my work. I feel guilty for my children, so I have decided to go camping at least twice this year. I like to go to the park on weekends.

-> I like going camping. The camping place is the perfect place for my children. My son and I usually play baseball while my daughter likes to ride a bike. My wife reads book at the bench. One of my favorite camping place in Seoul is the Han River park. It is surrounded by beautiful nature and there are various activities that families can do together. I have purchased tents and copel and other equipments necessary for the camping last year. I could only go camping once because of my work. I feel guilty for my children, so I have decided to go camping at least twice this year.

I like to go to the park on weekends.I go there almost every Saturday with my family and always prepare some food such as homemade sandwiches, salads and kookies Because, it take only five minutes to get there from my house.

-> I like to go to the park every weekend. I go there almost every Saturday with my family and always prepare some food such as homemade sandwiches, salads and cookies because, it takes only five minutes to get there from my house.

 

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Hello there Bryan,

Thank you for writing again and telling me the things that you do for your family. Work is important, but our family is the most important thing in the world so make sure that you always have time for them. :)

교정 내용이 클립보드에 복사되었습니다!