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공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 08. 04 조회 13172

Respond to the e-mail by contacting the office manager ..

작성자: 71219 담당 튜터: Love
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
Hello, This is Jason from sales department.
I called you again as soon as I read your e-mail about the new phone.
I can't believe that I will not be able to receive the new phone until next month.

As I told you, I am a sales person. And I have to bring the new phone for this business trip.
Because my client wants to check the specification of the new phone during the meeting.
That's why I asked you that if the new phone has been developed, give me the phone immediately.

Is there any problem if you provide the new phone for me?
Please let me know why you will not be able to give me the new phone.

As you know, I've already been waiting almost one week and require the new phone at once.
I am supposed to explain this situation to my boss.
And then I am going to decide to put off my business trip or not.
튜터 교정 답변

Hello, This is Jason from sales department. I called you again as soon as I read your e-mail about the new phone. I can't believe that I will not be able to receive the new phone until next month. As I told you, I am a sales person. And I have to bring the new phone for this business trip. Because my client wants to check the specification of the new phone during the meeting. That's why I asked you that if the new phone has been developed, give me the phone immediately. Is there any problem if you provide the new phone for me? Please let me know why you will not be able to give me the new phone. As you know, I've already been waiting almost one week and require the new phone at once. I am supposed to explain this situation to my boss. And then I am going to decide to put off my business trip or not.

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-> Hello, this is Jason from Sales Department.

->  As I told you, I am a sales person. Thus, I have to bring the new phone for this business trip because my client wants to check the specification of the new phone during the meeting.

-> That's why I asked you to give me the phone as soon as it has been developed.

- > As you know, I've already been waiting for almost one week and require the new phone at once.

-> And Then I am going to decide if I'm going to put off my business trip or not.

 

Hi Jason,

Thank you for submitting your composition. You were able to write a good letter, with minimal lapses only. Kindly check your corrections. I hope I helped. See you next meeting Jason!smiley

 

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