Internet

My favorite site is DAUM that was second major portal site in KOREA. because major portal site can provide me many kind of information like a sport, webtoon, knowhow of life, and so on. we can connect many article and find information to searching major portal. so i spend many time in portal site. our country's Most frequently major portal is NAVER. And their user is about 80% of all internet user. ButNaver is unreliable in political issue. they remove searched keyword that a bad news for ruling party of all time and espacially during election. that Result, government shut one's eyes to naver's monopolistic position. i like DAUM better than NAVER. I think internet must be a place of public opinion. portal owner and gevernment don't fabricate public opinion for their goal.

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CORRECTIONS:

My favorite site is Daum that was the second major portal site in Korea, because major portal site can provide many kinds of information like a sport, webtoon, knowhow of life, and so on.

-Note: Make the sentence complete. Do not use all capital letter, such as KOREA and DAUM. You can write, Korea and Daum.

We can read many articles and search information that is why I spend most of my times in portal site. Our country's most frequently used portal is Naver. Their users is about 80% of all internet user but Naver is unreliable site.

-Note:Arrange the sentence, use simple words.

Naver remove the chance of searching for some articles especially about bad information during elections. The Korean government disallowed Naver to publish bad articles.

-Note: I changed the whole sentence because it is not clear and has no thoughts.

I like Daum better than Naver. I think internet must be a place of public opinions. The owner of the sites and the Korean government should not change or fabricate information for their own sake.

-Notes: Do not forget to make it simple. That way, it will be easier to understand.