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공개 첨삭 완료 2015. 07. 13 조회 14051

What kind of roles will Korea take in the 21st century?

작성자: pos601974 담당 튜터: JoeM1
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
Korea will contribute to such as education, food, and health. First, providing Korean education system enables Korea to make meaningful footprints. There are many people who are deprived of the chance of getting education in the world. On the other hands, most Koreans get education for free because elementary and middle level educations are mandatory for all the people. I expect Korea will help many other countries through providing Korean education system with them and building and operating some training centers in there. Second, developed skills and technologies of Korea regarding farming and medical areas allow Korea fight for world hunger and serious disease. Korean people are farming with not only various tools but also several machines to make work easy and efficient. In medical area, Korea has developed western medical technologies as well as oriental medical skills and knowledge. That’s why Korea can help many people who suffer from hunger and disease in the world.
튜터 교정 답변

Korea will contribute to such things as education, food, and health. First,  Providing the Korean style education system enables Korea to make meaningful footprints. There are many people who are deprived of the chance of getting an education in the world. On the other hands, most Koreans get an education for free because elementary and middle level educations are mandatory for all the people. I expect Korea will help many other countries through providing a Korean style education system with  for them and by building and operating some training centers. in there. Second, developed skills and technologies of Korea regarding farming and medical areas allow Korea to fight for world hunger and serious disease. Korean people are farming with not only various tools but also several machines to make work easyier and more efficient. In the medical area, Korea has developed western medical technologies as well as oriental medical skills and knowledge. That’s why Korea can help many people who suffer from hunger and disease in the world.

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