YOUR COMPOSITION:
When deciding which job I would take, the commute time is most important. Here are some reasons to support my opinion. First, I would like to work from nearby my house. In my case, I live in nearby Steel Making Plant. It takes about 20 minutes by my car. So, I can save the commute time and I don’t waste time. Secondly, I can save the gasoline and money for driving my car. Because my house is not far away from at work. That’ why I go along with this statement.
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CORRECTED:
When deciding which job to take, commuting time is most important. Here are some reasons to support my opinion. First, I would like to work nearby my house. In my case, I live in nearby the Steel Making Plant. It takes about 20 minutes by my car, so I can save and I don’t waste time commuting. Secondly, I can save gasoline and money when driving my car because my house is not far from work. That’s why I agree with this statement.
COMPARISON:
1. You said: When deciding which job I would take, the commute time is most important.
->Please say: When deciding which job to take, commuting time is the most important.
2. You said: First, I would like to work from nearby my house.
->Please say: First, I would like to work nearby my house.
3. You said: In my case, I live in nearby Steel Making Plant.
->Please say: In my case, I live nearby the Steel Making Plant.
4. You said: It takes about 20 minutes by my car. So, I can save the commute time and I don’t waste time.
->Please say: It takes about 20 minutes by my car, so I can save and I don’t waste time commuting.
5. You said: Secondly, I can save gasoline and money for driving my car because my house is not far from work.
->Please say: Secondly, I can save gasoline and money for driving my car. Because my house is not far away from at work.
6. You said: That’ why I go along with this statement.
->Please say: That’s why I agree with this statement.
Hello, Mr. Antonio!
Please try to see the corrected composition and the comparison to see the difference. I hope this helps.