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공개 첨삭 완료 2016. 01. 21 조회 11880

Traditional holiday

작성자: 87316 담당 튜터: Sheryl
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I'd like to tell you about Lunar new year's day as traditional holiday in my country.
Lunar holiday is pretty big traditional holiday in my country. First, At that time, Relatives gather togather at their hometown even thought they will be suffering from havy traffic. Second they prepare meals to eat togater. Such as rice-cake soup, half-moon-sharped rice-cake and so on. Woman are usually in charge of cooking, so they spend almost time in the kitchen all day. I'm afraid it. Finally, We play Yut. Yut is traditional board game in my country. Everyone can enjoy playing Yut which is really simple, easy and funny. In the Lunar new year's day, there is hard to gather familly because of not only very busy but also need a lot of momey. However, the day is pretty important and meaningful for Korean.
튜터 교정 답변

I'd like to tell you about Lunar New Year's Day as a traditional holiday in my country. Lunar holiday is a pretty, big traditional holiday in my country. First, at that time,  families and  relatives gather together at their hometowns even though they suffer from a heavy traffic. Second, they prepare meals and eat together, such as rice cake soup, half-moon-sharped rice cakes and so on. Women are usually in charge of cooking, so they spend almost all their time in the kitchen all day. I'm afraid of it. Finally, we play Yut. Yut is a traditional board game in my country. Everyone can enjoy playing Yut because it is really simple, easy and fun to play with. In Lunar New Year's Day, there are hardships for families because of not only they are very busy but also they need a lot of money. However, this holiday is pretty important and meaningful for Koreans.

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