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공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 05. 09 조회 14281

Business Trip

작성자: 1101091787 담당 튜터: JJ
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
Today, I hope to talk about business trip!

I am am cost estimation team and I handle software related to manufacturing.
I sometimes get a chance to travel for business intetnationally.
My most recent business trip was to China.
I made a tour of the local factory and had a meeting with the staff there.
I went there with two other members of my team.
During that trip, we were too busy looking at the factory so we didn't get to take a city tour. I remember that trip. becuase the business partner in China booked us a 5-star hotel so we got to enjoy the breakfast and sauna at no cost.
It was too luxury for us. so I will never forget this business trip
튜터 교정 답변

CORRECTION:

1.  I am am cost estimation team and I handle software related to manufacturing.

> I am a (put article "a") member of the cost estimation team and I handle software related manufacturing.

2.  I sometimes get a chance to travel for business intetnationally.

> I sometimes get a chance to have a business trip abroad.

3. My most recent business trip was to China.

> My most recent business trip was in (use preposition "in") China.

4.  I made a tour of the local factory and had a meeting with the staff there.

>  I had (use "had") a tour of the local factory and had a meeting with the staff there.

5.  I remember that trip. becuase the business partner in China booked us a 5-star hotel so we got to enjoy the breakfast and sauna at no cost.

>  I wll (future tense "will")  always remember that trip (no period) because (spelling)  our (use "our") business partner in China booked us in (add preposition "in") a 5-star hotel so we got to enjoy the breakfast and sauna for free (better to use this).

 6. It was too luxury for us. so I will never forget this business trip

>  It was too luxurious for us so I will never forget this business trip. (put period)

 

Hello Jeong,

 

Happy Monday. I am happy that you always write here. Here are my corrections. I hope it will help you improve your skill. Always be careful with your preposition, article, tenses and spelling next time, okay? Have a wonderful day!! ^^,

 

Teacher Jj

   
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