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공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 05. 12 조회 12313

My Job

작성자: 71850 담당 튜터: Brooke
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I am a senior engineer in the mobile service department.
My main role as senior engineer is to lead the development of the mobile service for the enterprise customers. There are 10 junior engineers in my team. My team consists of 6 men and 4 women.

I usually start to work at 9 and finish to work at 6:30.
After I finish my work, I have a chance to drink some beer with my colleages sometimes. It was very pleasant time for me. It removed some stresses of my work.
튜터 교정 답변

I am a senior engineer in the mobile service department. My main role as senior engineer is to lead the development of the mobile service for the enterprise customers. There are 10 junior engineers in my team. My team consists of 6 men and 4 women. I usually start to work at 9 and finish to work at 6:30. After I finish my work, I have a chance to drink some beer with my colleages sometimes. It was very pleasant time for me. It removed some stresses of my work.

 

Dear Andrew, 

    Wow! you did great in composing your sentences. You know how to organize your sentences in your speech. Keep up the good work.

 

Teacher Brooke^_^

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