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공개 첨삭 완료 2016. 05. 12 조회 12708

I went to a park for a picnic.

작성자: 121640 담당 튜터: Erik2
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I have been to the Lake park with my family last month. Lake park was closed to my apartment, so it took only 10 minutes with my car. We enjoyed a picnic in the park. We prepared a few bottles of drinks in the icebox and some food such as fried chickens and pizza. We also brought a small table, potable chairs and a mat to spread in the shade. After setting the place, I played catch with my children for about half an hour. We had sweat over, so I drank some beer and gave my children cokes from the icebox. And we enjoyed prepared food.
튜터 교정 답변

I have been to the Lake park with my family last month. Lake park was closed to my apartment, so it took only 10 minutes with my car. We enjoyed a picnic in the park. We prepared a few bottles of drinks in the icebox and some food such as fried chickens and pizza. We also brought a small table, potable chairs and a mat to spread in the shade. After setting the place, I played catch with my children for about half an hour. We had sweat over, so I drank some beer and gave my children cokes from the icebox. And we enjoyed prepared food.

-- I went to the Lake park with my family last month.  Lake park is close to my apartment, so it took only 10 minutes for us to get there by car.  We had an enjoyable picnic at the park.  We brought some bottled drinks along in an icebox, and such food as fried chicken and pizza.  [[[The next 2 sentences are good, except "potable chairs" should be "portable chairs" or "folding chairs". ]]]  After that we were all sweaty, so I drank some beer and gave my children some sodas from the icebox.  Then we enjoyed the food we had brought.

 

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