목록으로 돌아가기
공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 01. 10 조회 13217

Homework - team building

작성자: 121062 담당 튜터: Love
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
OK. I'd like to tell you about the difference between team recreation and team building.
Team building can be free. It means everyone who want to join the team can start anytime with other member.
And it also can finish anytime even if it doesn't have any performance since it isn't that must have a performance.
The other way, Team recreation can be forcful. Join and leave is forceful.
Team recreation always have some propose , it means that the team must archive the goal.
튜터 교정 답변
OK. I'd like to tell you about the difference between team recreation and team building. Team building can be free. It means everyone who want to join the team can start anytime with other member. And it also can finish anytime even if it doesn't have any performance since it isn't that must have a performance. The other way, Team recreation can be forcful. Join and leave is forceful. Team recreation always have some propose , it means that the team must archive the goal. ============================================================== Here are some corrections noted in your sentences: It means everyone who want to join the team can start anytime with other member. It means everyone who wants to join the team can start anytime with other members. (Use the singular form "wants" with "everyone" and use the plural form, "members" with "other".) And it can also finish anytime even it doesn't have any performance since it isn't that must have a performance. Furthermore, it can finish anytime even without any performance, since it isn't really a must-have. (Avoid starting your sentence with a conjunction (And). Be mindful with the order of words and separate clauses with a comma /,/) The other way, team recreation can be forcful. Join and leave is forceful. On the other hand, team recreation can be forceful. You are forced to join and leave. (Better to use "on the other hand" and be mindful of your spelling of "forceful".) Team recreation always have some propose, it means the team must archive their goal. Team recreation always has some purpose. It means the team must achieve their goal. (Subject-verb agreement - use the singular verb "has". Use two separate sentences for your ideas and be mindful of your spelling of "achieve".) I hope this helps. Thank you!^^
교정 내용이 클립보드에 복사되었습니다!