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공개 첨삭 완료 2020. 09. 11 조회 10262

5 Inventions

작성자: ckd103859 담당 튜터: Vanessa2
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I would like to introduce 5 inventions that was devised by Korean. It was excerted from blo article.

1. Mixed Coffee
Coffe is well known around the world.
In 1976, Dong suh which is Korea food company, launched mixed coffee with creme, and sugar.
2.Carton Milk
It may sounds strange but the paper container was invented during Korean War. Korean man padded the papter with water proof material from US troop store;PX. Unfortunately, it could not be submitted as patent during the war time.
3.MP3 player.
Without CD or Tape inside the gadget, songs can be stores as a mp3 format file. The first MP3 player was MP man F10 which was invented in 1997.

4. Law for Hydrogen.
It is not exactly product invention, but law. The purpose of the law is expand economy by hydrogen.

5. Navigation for Ocean.
As an advanced IT country, Korea. will introduce navigation for ocean which enable100km distance network.
튜터 교정 답변

I would like to introduce 5 inventions that was devised by Korean. It was excerted from blo article.
-by Koreans

-These facts are from a blog excerpt


1. Mixed Coffee
Coffe is well known around the world.
In 1976, Dong suh which is Korea food company, launched mixed coffee with creme, and sugar.

-In 1976, Dong Suh which is a Korean food company, launched their instant coffee mixed wtih cream and sugar.


2.Carton Milk
It may sounds strange but the paper container was invented during Korean War. Korean man padded the papter with water proof material from US troop store;PX. Unfortunately, it could not be submitted as patent during the war time.

-Milk Carton

-It may sound strange/ strange as it may sound but the paper container was invented during the Korean war. Koreans added a layer of waterproof material on the paper. The material was bought from an American store. Unfortunately, the invention couldn't recieve patent at that time.


3.MP3 player.
Without CD or Tape inside the gadget, songs can be stores as a mp3 format file. The first MP3 player was MP man F10 which was invented in 1997.
-songs can be stored..


4. Law for Hydrogen.
It is not exactly product invention, but law. The purpose of the law is expand economy by hydrogen.

-Korea proposed a law to grow  the economy.
- The purpose of the law is to expand hydrogen economy of the country. Increasing the production of  fuels..etc.


5. Navigation for Ocean.
As an advanced IT country, Korea. will introduce navigation for ocean which enable100km distance network.

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