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공개 첨삭 완료 2014. 06. 19 조회 12544

Traveling internationally

작성자: 1102047346 담당 튜터: Lovela
수강생 원문과 튜터 교정 (Before & After)
학생 제출 원문
I have been to go abroad twice since I was born. When I was in high school, I went to China with my class. I was very excited to go abroad for the first time. The place I went to china is Shanghi. I felt weird after I arrived in Shanghi. Because the sky was yellow. How could be the sky yellow? I guess the sky was filled with dust. Even the food was not good. So oily! I didn’t know why the food was made like that. I wanted to eat Kimchi because it was so greasy. Although it was not satisfying about the environment and food, it was a great travel. I could be with my classmates. The most memorable thing about the trip was Oriental pearl tower. It was a high building. I had to stretch my neck when I wanted to see the top from the bottom. I got the top by riding elevator. People at the bottom and other buildings looked like figures. At night I rode a cruise ship at river nearby the tower. I could appreciate the night view with my classmates on there. It was so beautiful. I missed that day!
튜터 교정 답변

I have been to abroad twice since I was born. When I was in high school, I went to China with my classmates. I was very excited to go abroad for the first time. I went to china particularly in Shanghai. I felt weird when I arrived in Shanghai because the sky was yellow. How could be the sky yellow? I guess the sky was filled with dust. Even the food was not good. It is so oily! I didn’t know why the food was made like that. I wanted to eat Kimchi because it was so greasy. Although I was not satisfied about the environment and food, it was a great travel. I could be with my classmates. The most memorable thing about the trip was the Oriental pearl tower. It was a high building. I had to stretch my neck if I wanted to see the bottom from the top. I got at the top by riding an elevator. People at the bottom and other buildings looked like figures. At night, I rode a cruise ship at river nearby the tower. I appreciate the night view with my classmates there. It was so beautiful. I missed that day!

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